never a best friend

I just realized I never had a best friend in my life. I mean, I've never had a friend who considered me their best friend. People have always either thought of me as their very good friend or just another friend. There's never one person who I can absolutely anything too. I'm not complaining, I have very good friends. I'm not sure exactly what I'm saying right now, but it made sense in my head. Let's say it this way: if I was walking with someone somewhere, I'd know in the back of mind that I was not their best friend. It's weird thinking about it, but I just realized that tonight. So, apparently didn't know what I was talking about. If I'm walking with someone, in the back of mind, I know that person has a better friend. There it is, that's it. That is exactly what I mean.